Sixty-Four
by CaptainDaveStrider
Summary: Your name is Dave Strider, and you've been in love for 6 years with a goofy boy. You thought it was fine, until the boy you loved became.. broken.. (Hospital AU, Sadstuck is literally everywhere. )
1. February 11th

=== Be David Elizabeth Strider.

February 11th.

Congratulations, you have somehow managed to be the cool kid. Of course, you can't really be as cool as him even if you tried. The cool kid however, strode into the blue and white building quickly.

Your sunglasses firmly placed onto the bridge of your slightly freckled nose, hiding the crimson orbs that lurked behind. You were used to this walk, the outside of the institute was beautiful. The pavement's sides were covered in simple wild flowers. Almost weeds in a way, but nonetheless beautiful. To the left of the building was a huge oak tree, truly wonderful indeed.

However, the beauty of the building was none of your, Dave Strider's, main concern. No, you were forced to memorize a familiar walk. The main desk lady, a pretty lady with black hair that had a nice red tint to it, always waved you on wards. Forcing a sweet but pained smile with those red lips of hers. Her brown eyes painted with a background of red in a red polka a dot dress.

You never asked, but you presumed it was her favorite color. When she smiled, you'd smile back of course, even if it was a fake one. She knew it was a faked smile, of course she knew... How could you work as a receptionist for a hospital and be unable to see fake smiles?

You doubted she expected to see you give her a true smile while walking into a hospital. No, She wasn't that dumb.. Not at all.

Ah yes, after being motioned on by Aradia (you believe that's her name, you can't recall), you begin your walk by going to the left of her desk and down the wide hall way. Crimson eyes focusing on the floor's blue and white tiles. Counting them in your head. Sixty-two. Always sixty-two before reaching the wooden white painted door to the stair well.

Grabbing the cool circular handle, you'd start up the flight of stairs until you were out of breath and on floor four.

The rest of the journey was easy, opening the door to the hall. Looking at the creamy walls in blank thoughts. Not really paying attention as he passed nurses and sickly people as you reached the dreaded spot. Halting at the door as your eyes focused on the door's number. Thirteen.

You tilted your head down to focus on the patient. His hair was moped messily across his freckle sprayed face. His hair looked as through it was a bit unclean, which it most likely was. In your opinion, it looked cuter like that anyhow.

His glasses were off and on the side table to his left. His eyes closed tightly, as if not desiring sleep even if the dark rings under his eyes clearly showed he needed it. His body in a tiny ball hidden by the white blanket that laid over him. You sigh, running a hand through your own blonde fair head.

Yes, this was the mess of a guy you loved. No, Not a mess, just wounded. It wasn't his fault.. It never was..

He wasn't always like this, no.. You remember the day he broke into a coughing fit with blood mixed into it all. You remember him smiling at you, even as blood dripped blood. You remember his strained smile.. You remember your own face, completely losing your cool facade as it was replaced with horror.. Yes.. You remember.

Shaking your head swiftly, you decide to stalk silently to the chair that was placed beside his bed. It's comfortable, and in way a very nice spot to sit, the chair is a fluffy arm chair that slightly devours you. Deciding not to wake the ebony haired boy, you glance around the room.

The blue curtains were pulled over the window to black out the sun. The tv was mounted by the dresser that was in front of the patients bed. The walls were a light blue color, with a creamy floor color. You honestly thought the hospital used too much blue. But the raven haired boy said he loved the blue, so you loved it as well.

To the right by the window was where John's laptop laid, You used to stay up all the time talking to him through Pesterchum. Now, it seemed like it was years in the past. You bit your lip to devour your own sadness at the thought, growling a bit on your inside before attempting to distract yourself.

You glance to the slumbering guy before pulling out your phone. Bro knew where you were, he always did. It had become a daily accordance that you over the summer would get up early and head to the hospital. As tired and dreary as you were, you didn't care.

You sigh dully before turning your attention to the new vase of flowers beside his bed. Mr. Egbert barely had time to visit his son, due to his baking career and bills. But when he did, he'd bring flowers and cards with too many words for you to stomach.

You had met Mr. Egbert once, yes, you couldn't quite recall the date.. But who could? It was horrific and you couldn't stop crying (you deny that). The most you recalled about the guy was his hat, and the smell of cakes that perfumed him insanely.

It seemed like an eternity of useless thoughts before a pair of blue eyes blinked open drowsily. Slowly landing on you for a second, before giving way to a yawn as he rubbed his eyes.

"Dave?" The small voice asked, scratchy sounding, almost hoarse. You would offer to get him water, but it never helped him..

"Hey there, John." You cooed quietly with a weak smile. Eyeing his features and etching his features into your memory, everyday you did this..

"How long have you been there?" John asked meekly, grinning a buck-toothed grin at you. Oh god, how fucking adorable. You feel your cheeks heat at the thought, but choke it down as you are a Strider.

"Not long.." You decide, taping at your phone to check the time. 11:23.

"Ten minutes, maybe." You mutter, knowing it was way more than ten minutes. Like hell you'd let him know that.

"You could have woken me up!" John laughed as he wrapped the blanket around his fists and snuggled underneath it. Only his head was visible to your ember eyes.

"Nah, you need your sleep dude." You tell him as you watch his smile twitch into a small frown. It pains you to watch that happen, but you knew he was fine.

"I can sleep when you're not here, Dave." John muttered as he flashed a glare. Oh, a mad pouty John. Fuck. That's adorable too.

"But do you?" You fire back with a raise of a light eyebrow. John mutters a inaudible reply with a small groan as he ducks his head into the blanket.

"What is that? I can't hear you with all that blanket it in your face." You smirk as you watch the ebony head reappear, only to the bridge of his nose. Staring at you with those bright sky blue eyes. Those blue eyes, damn them. The bright baby blue eyes could go from pleading to anger and still be the cutest shit.

"Shut up Dave." John murmured as he simply stared at you, watching you as you stood and grabbed his glasses off the side table. Offering them to him as you watched him take them and set them on his face. Blinking those beloved blue eyes as they readjusted to the new improved sight.

"C'mon four eyes, lets get you some breakfast." You teased with a grin, watching him stick out his tongue at you as he flipped the blankets off himself. Sure, John was sickly, but he was strong. Stronger than you could of ever imagined.

"Sure thing sunglass wearing weirdo." John grinned at you as you feigned with your hand over your heart.

"Yeesh, call the doctors, I've been slain by a Egbert!" You whined as John laughed and punched your shoulder weakly. You smirk slyly before focusing onto his body, not in a sexual way, no.. Just realizing how small he had gotten. Sure, he was always smaller than you (especially since you're 6'1 and he's 5'4), but he seemed even smaller now in his hospital attire.

The gown flowed to his knees in a cascading way, the light blue color of it complimented his dark hair. Even if in your opinion, the gown showed a little too much of John's backside. (You blushed furiously when you first saw and had to escape to the bathroom to gather your wits.)

You held out your red material covered arm for him as he swung his feet to the side, slipping on some sandals.

"Right this way Milady." You tell him as he hooked his arm with yours, frowning as he glared at you. Light blush covering his freckles. Oh god.

"Why am I the lady?" He asked in a serious tone that made you laugh a bit.

"Because I'm your knight!" You informed him as you both began a slow pace to the elevators. You couldn't help but notice him shake his arm. You knew he didn't mean to.. But he did..

The walk was rather quiet as you stepped into the elevator with John beside you.

"I'm not too hungry.." He muttered, you fully knew this though. He always told you he skipped breakfast, and skipped eating it at your house too. He wasn't much of a morning eater, you suppose.

"I know." You say, offering a weary smile as you mashed the first floor button. Feeling the bright blue orbs fall on you. He grins at you as you return and take his arm again.

It's a quiet journey as the elevator halts on the first floor, and you go to the cafeteria. Watching John as he giggles and talks to the lunch ladies. You eye them from behind them, you know the fake feelings of joy they feel staring at John. It's easy to see the hidden hopelessness.. And it sickens you.

You had always been good at reading people, but now it was a cursed talent when in a hospital.

It.. was cursed..

"C'mon Dave!" He awakens you from your thoughts with his head tilted up at you. Bright blue eyes beaming into your soul as he stared and tugged at your sleeve. Fuck. So adorable.

You grin, "Yeah yeah." You mutter as the tiny ebony haired cutie drags you to a table where you sit beside him. Glancing at his food dully. It's nothing special, just a bowl of fruit loops, a carton of milk and- you stop as he throws a small box to you with a giggle. Fuck that's cute too.

You glance at he box dully before realizing its apple juice and laugh a little. Even though you feel sadness ebb at your gut.

"Aww, shit man. You remembered." You laugh as you clutch the small juice box, before jamming the straw into the box.

"How could I forget your favorite? I'm hurt Dave!" John laughed as he watched you with his perfect eyes. You shrug as you drink the nectar of the gods, no way in hell could you chug it. It's like a sin.

You watched John eat a few bites of his fruit loops before seeing his face become dull and bored. Clearly day dreaming, you decide quickly. "Yo John." You ask slowly before watching his eyes slowly turn to you.

"Yeah?" He answers slowly, raising a dark eyebrow.

"Are you gonna eat that or play with it?" You asked dully with a twitch of your lip as he stuck his tongue at you. Grabbing his tray and taking it to the lunch ladies again, stopping to talk as you yet again stand there idly. He did the most outrageous motions with his hands as he spoke to them. You couldn't quite hear, but you heard the ladies laugh with him as he turned away.

You watched this, of course, it reminded you of how much John spoke with his hands. It was cute, no doubt, and rather funny to watch him do. He eyed him from behind your sunglasses as he walked back to you. Hooking his arm with yours (you bent a bit at this, due to his height), leading you away to the elevator silently.

You forgot about your unfinished Apple Juice in the cafeteria. You never did that. You never remembered until days later..

"Hey Dave.." He said to you quietly as he stared at the elevator door. You glanced at him with a frown, his voice sounded sad,

"Yeah?"

"When can I see your eyes?" John muttered, shocking you as you laughed quietly, almost sheepishly as you avoid eye contact before looking back to his cute face.

"Over my dead body." You tell him sternly, twitching a grin as he offers a small smile.

"How about mine? That's sooner.." He whispered quietly... This makes your mind go blank, you want to yell.. To tell him he's wrong.. But what proof do you have to show him? Nothing.. And the doctors.. They.. Fuck them..

So you do what any heart broken teen would do, you simply kneel down to his height level and wrap your arms around him. Hearing him sob softly into your shoulder breaks you.. You give way to tears and have no voice left as you return the favor on his shoulder.

I'm so sorry, John. I'm sorry.. I can't protect you.. I'm sorry.


	2. February 15th

**Wow, 3 reviews on one chapter. I just.. ? ? ? I'm honoredjfjdgnd**

**I'm not very good at second (? maybe? I can't remember, cut me slack, First day of summer hehe) person point of view, so I formally (not so formally, this is through text, you idiot!) apologize for my.. Noob...ness? **

**and yes.**

**Sadstuck is my aim with fluff everywhere. oh my god**

**im worried because you all were sad over the first chapTER BUT GUYS ITS ONLY GOING TO GET SADDER AND FLUFFIER? ? ? (?))?)?(?(?)**

* * *

=== Be David Hella Strider

_February 15th._

"Hey there, Dave." Aradia waves to you, her face bedazzled by freckles really stood out to you today, causing you to blink expectantly your crimson eyes behind your shades. It wasn't everyday the very red attendant spoke to you but either way it was nice.

"Hey Aradia." You answer slowly as you approach the circular desk, watching her smile a rather.. sad smile? Well that's not good, you decide rather quickly as you stared at her red painted eye shadow.

"I have something for you.. Kind of." She tells you as she shoves off the desk that held all her papers and a computer. Her roller-chair moving to the back to where a cabinet was. Something you'd never really paid any means of attention to before this. You watched her dully, becoming a tad bored as she dug through the papers in the draws.

She looked rather nice from his view, yet again a dark red dress with a black stripe on the middle. Her dark-red type hair was cascading down past her waist, gathering at the bottom of the chair. Though, the most you could see WAS the chair.

"Aha- Here it is." She told you, turning around swiftly with something in between her red painted finger nails. It took you a moment to realize it was a watch, sort of.

"It's uhm.. An alarm.. kind of." She muttered to you, holding her hand out expectantly as her brown eyes moved between the device and you. You frowned at this, taking it slowly before inspecting it yourself.

"It.. Press the middle.. John last night was kind of bad.. Press it if.." She trailed off, her own voice shaking with the thoughts of it. You frowned a bit more over this, pulling your right sleeve up and wrapping the device around your wrist.

"Yeah." You told her, your voice fully lacking emotion. You feared if you showed emotion, you wouldn't be able to stop. And it was way too early for that nonsense, you thought bitterly as you bit your lip. Covering the device with your red material shirt quickly.

You moved your eyes to meet Aradia's fully knowing she couldn't see your eyes behind the shades. "Well.." She said slowly before forcing a fake smile.

"Go on now.." She told you meekly, forcing another smile. Man, you honestly hated that.

You decided not to reply as you took the ever so familiar path, counting the tiles that you counted everyday. Sixty-Two. Always sixty-two. You once again, reach the door and head up the stairs quickly, huffing as you run out of breath. Floor four, the door says, so you open and head to John's room.

You enter his room as quiet as a mouse and return to the comfy chair that threatens to eat you with it's fluff. Sitting there for a few moment, just watching John sleep before calling yourself creepy.

You pull out your iPhone and tap for the time, It's only 9:14, so you allow yourself to yawn a bit as you look at John.

He doesn't look as pained as the days before, 'John last night was kind of bad.', you remember Aradia's words and feel a lump of sadness in your throat. Of course. He's probably drugged, you sigh a bit. You might be here for hours before he wakes up, but you have no idea what to do.

After a few games of Flappy Birds (and oh, way too much silent raging and mouthing curse words), and not beating your high score (you don't even want to mention that). You accidentally dozed off. Go you. Best decision ever.

"Daavvee.." A soft voice murmured, making you wrinkle your nose unknowingly as something prodded at your cheek.

"If you keep this up, I'll take off your sunglasssesssss." The sweet voice cooed, almost threateningly, at this you frowned. Becoming semi aware as you blinked your crimson orbs open to the world.

"You wouldn't dare.." You muttered a bit darkly as your turned your head from being mashed against the side of the recliner. You couldn't help but notice the bright blue eyes staring back at you turned your head. It was a pretty nice wake up call to see a buck-toothed cutie in front of you. Inches away from your face, really.

"You know I would! Hehe!" John giggled at you, which was pretty freaking cute you decided. You laughed at him, grinning darkly.

"I didn't know you were so loony, Egbert." You teased him gently with a grin, reaching out to mess up his already messed up hair. First off, It's not exactly how you managed. The black hair is actually about twelve times softer in all honesty.

The raven-locks feel like a pile of kittens between your fingers, hell, maybe just like a pile of feathers. You're not sure, maybe It's silk? Eh, Just imagine something really soft and multiply the softness by twenty percent. Yeah, that's John's hair.

Hell, what does he wash his hair with? You don't have the time to ask because by the time you stop admiring his hair he's smacking your hand away in a fit of giggles.

"Shut up, Dave!" He grinned out, beaming ever so slightly at you as he walked away from you quickly, sitting back on his bed. To which you took the time to stand up an stretch, yawning a bit before glancing to him.

"What time is it?" You inquired blankly, not really caring in all honesty. You had all the time in the world, kind of. You're weren't very good with keeping up with time. you were like, the worst at cooking stuff and watching the timers. Hell, time was your worst enemy if anything.

"Uhmmm..." John muttered as he glanced to the side of his bed, blinking his blue eyes behind the glasses he wore all the time.

"It's 12:14. I've been up since 11:40 ish, But you looked so peaceful!" He told you, making the weirdest hand gestures as he looked at you. He looked as if he was presenting a project and you were the project. Oh god, you'd love to be his proje- uh.

"Jees, John! You could have woken me up!" You taunted, grinning at him dumbly as he frowned at you. "You looked peaceful when sleeping." He repeated, making you sigh numbly.

"I can sleep peacefully when I'm not here." You quoted him, making him groan and flop back on the bed. Dangling his legs off the side, it looked funny with the gown on, in your honest opinion.

"Deja vu!" He cried in a whiney tone, making you shiver a little bit. However you grinned despite your odd shivers.

"You said it to me first!" You laughed at him, looking down on the shorter guy who was flopped on the bed. He sat up a bit quickly, glaring at you darkly. (Which honestly made your heart flutter at those blue eye- No. No you deny that..)

"Yeah yeahhhhhh.. Wanna go play chess?" He asked you, making you raise an eyebrow.

Now, You have a few memories of playing chess with John.

They're.. interesting to say the least. First off, the kid was an A++++ chess player (either that or you were complete shit, thought you denied the latter.). No one in High school could beat him, and you weren't sure if that bought him gloating rights or not. You doubted it, Who the hell would even gloat over chess?

"Uhm." You mutter simply, blinking with a slight twitch. You focused on the ceiling for a few seconds in silence before finding yourself staring at the blue eyed boy.

Of course, he was making you uncomfortable with his eye contact, even if yours were blocked by shades. You weren't too uncomfortable, but you just felt like those blue eyes were eating away at the core of your soul.

"C'mon Dave. Don't be a wuss." John mocked, raising both his eyebrows at him when you choked. Laughing way harder than you honestly should have.

"Fine, Egbert, Get changed and then we'll dance the tango too." You sighed, flopping back into the chair as you watched the ebony haired boy squeak. Yes, squeak. And holy fuck, it was too adorable for your heart to bare. Thank god you're in a hospital because call 911, Your name is Dave Strider and you've been victim of a cute attack.

"Really? You'll play?" He squeaked out, making you die even more inside. You roll your eyes as you choke down your emotions of cute overload.

"Yeah.. But get changed so we can go to the lobby." You muttered, making him squeak even louder as he jumps up in joy. Oh god.

You're stuck standing there awkwardly as he wraps his arms around your chest in a hug before bounding away quickly to rummage through his clothes. You're thanking the gods that he let go quickly, you already felt your blood heat up at just that.

Jees, You're a wuss.

You stand there for a few more minutes, hands tucked in your jean's pockets as John is in the bathroom changing. You could wear your gown around the hospital, sure. But it was just awkward to go to the lobby with other people with your back showing. Naturally, Dave ushered John to change, knowing he'd feel awkward and regret it.

"Okkkaaayyy," John mutters, opening the bathroom door as he walked out slowly. You glanced at him with a grin. He was wearing jeans and the light blue hoodia that he loved so much. You didn't really understand the symbol on the front, but hey. None of your business.

"Let's go, Milady." You say to him gently as he walks to you, you don't hook arms this time. It kind of depresses you, but oh well. You let him walk out of the hospital room before you, and you take the time to close the door as John stands behind you.

"I'm ready, Mr. Knight." He told you as you turned back around to face the ebony haired boy. You swallowed a laugh as you saw his hands on his hips, and the biggest smile planted on his lips.

"I see." You tell him before grinning back at him, attempting to flip the hair you don't with your hand sassily have as you walk past him towards the elevator. John laughed at your gesture before falling beside you in your pace.

"So, Why chess?" You ask dully as you reach the elevator, pressing the white button that lights up to go down before looking to the boy that only comes up to your chest.

He blinked at you for a second before looking off towards the left, opposite of where you came. You sigh as you lean against the way, staring down your best friend. After a few seconds of the most awkward silence, he looked back to you with a loud, drawn out, sigh.

"Because it's fun." He said simply, making you roll your eyes from behind the shades as the elevator dinged. You turned back around to face a nurse, her hair styled up in a bun, and some old man in a gown. Respectfully, you kept to the side as she glanced from you to John before smiling at you both and ushering the old man on wards.

You glanced at the old man, taking in his details for a second. His hair was a wild, white shade mixed with gray. And he looked mad. Always mad, in fact. Who could live with being always mad? Weirdo.

You shrug as John entered the elevator before you and motioned you on wards. "No, But seriously. An old man would probably be better as your chess partner than I am." You told him blankly as you entered the elevator and mashed the lobby button. A routine you did everyday.

You glanced at John from the corner of your eyes, knowing he wouldn't be able to see that as you kept your head straight. However, you can't help but notice he's gnawing on his lip. Wow, That's a cute nervous habit too.

"It's more fun when I know I will win.." John muttered, stopping his lip biting to glance at you. You knew he couldn't tell you were looking at him, but oh well.

"Ouch. That's hurtful, John." You mutter, not really offended by this. You suck ass at chess. What the fuck even was chess about? You don't even know, you just know he loved it. So you suffered through games in order to make him smile.

Kidding, You kick ass at playing chess.

Kidding, You don't.

You blink a bit before focusing on the elevator door in silence, listening to the soft god damn awful elevator music before the 'Ding!' came and opened the door. Ah yes, That ding, It made you feel like you were a hot pocket in a microwave being baked. When would you be ready? Never, Nope nope. You're too cool to be a hot pocket, even though if you were any food it'd be a hot pocket. Those things are like heaven that you can make in under five minu-

"Dave?" John asked slowly, breaking you out of your hot pocket induced thoughts as you followed him out of the elevator.

"Yeah?" You asked, blinking as you glanced to the right, Aradia was seemingly reading something while twirling a pencil between her fingers. Must be a dull job.

"Nothing. You just seemed out of it." John shrugged, walking to the left, opposite of the main lobby.

The hospital was big, a bit too big for your understanding. But there was a game hall down on the lobby area for families to come in a chat while playing games. They had checkers, bingo on Thursdays (Uh.), and varies other games and stuff.

You sighed, glancing away from Aradia and following after the smaller boy. "I'm not out of it." You muttered in a late reply as you walked beside him, catching him grin up at you. His cheeks seems rosier than you remembered. Maybe it was your sunglasses? Oh well, It's cute with the freckles anyhow.

"Okay." He shrugs, You know he doesn't believe. But how the hell could you possibly tell him about how you were comparing the elevator to a microwave and you two were hot pockets? Right. You fuckin' don't.

The walk was just hushed silence as they passed other people in the hall, mainly old, shriveling up people really, before they reached the doors that looked like they came from the back of the lunch room from a sitcom. Or something.

You of course, jumped in front of John and opened the door for him. To which he gave you a blank stare and then entered the room. The room was pretty large, it had a nice view of the garden that they kept out back too.

It was a simple room layout, rows of tables with people chatting or playing games (a few playing poker- Thank god, not strip poker though). John, however, always went to the same spot that was closest to the window to view the garden. The table by there was stone with the chess board carved into it. The pieces were in a box under the table. It was pretty nice, actually.

John grabbed the box quickly as he sat across from you, handing you the white pieces while he kept the black ones. It took him little to no time to set up his side for the match, while you sat that making the pony neigh.

"Oh my god, Dave..." He whispered watching you move the piece around the board while neighing, before bursting into a fit of laughter. He snatched the piece quickly (along with the others, you assumed you were grounded) and moved to set up your side, still attempting to stifle his giggles.

"That's not cool. That horse and I have a bond." You muttered, watching him delicately place the pieces. You played the game, in between asking what each piece did (you made way too many jokes about the knight being the horse and neighed a lot over it) as you played. **  
**

It took little to no time for John to successfully have you in Check, and then check mate.

Which you had no idea what he meant when he yelled check, so you couldn't save yourself in anyway. You groaned while setting up your pieces again, holding the knight within your hands and eyeing it carefully. You blinked for a second before looking up to John, who seemed one-hundred percent focused with the window.

You frowned a little, How long had it been since John had went outside? It felt like ages, even if it was only a few months. You blinked, staring at his blue eyes before following his gaze to the flowers. Watching the wind blow on them delicately, a few petals dancing with it when it blew.

"You know, I really miss the wind." John muttered, making you laugh. The kid could run, and you remembered him all the time telling you about how he loved the way the wind hit his skin. You found it odd, but cute to see his wind blown hairstyle.

You glanced to John, who still seemed focused on the window before licking your lips and glancing around the room.

"Hey, John." You murmured, making him turn his view to you. His buck toothed smile had faded a bit with his own thoughts, making your heart wilt just a little bit more.

"Yeah?" He answered dully, glancing to the chessboard as he began resetting the board.

"Wanna go outside soon?" You asked, making him whip his head up. You swear, He'd get whiplash if he did that more often.

The ebony haired boy put his hands to cover his mouth, almost in an attempt to contain his excitement. You raised your eyebrows, watching him curling his fingers around his face, blue eyes beaming at you. If anyone wants to advertise happy, show off this kid because he looked like he was ready to fucking squeal. (You were about to, too. Just from this reaction he had.)

"Really?!"

* * *

**S-sorry this didn't really get anywhere...**

**Don't worry. Good stuff happens soon! But all that is good..**

**Comes with a price.**


	3. February 21st

**To Ship Them Ships; Thanks for the reviews uwu.. and uh-hahhahaaha(/sweatsnervously!)**

**omfg so many revIEWS IM UNWORTHY GOOD GOD**

**I'm so happy you guys like this. It means a lot to me! aaahhh ;w;**

**(I wrote this while talking to a really old friend! So I'm really happy!... *writes sad fanfiction* )**

* * *

=== Continue being David-I-Adore-Pinkie-Pie-Strider

_February 21st_

It took a few days, but hell you pulled it off. Of course you pulled it off, You pulled it off with little to no doubt because without being said, You are a Strider. Convincing people is a given trait in your genes. _You need that? Oh, Mr. Strider! Of course! Anything for you!_ All it takes was a little slip of the tongue and a few smirks.

You blink, staring down Aradia as she twirled in her chair like a little girl. Her hair swishing as the air flowed around her. You shrugged, leaning on the desk before daring to interrupt her. You came in a little.. too quietly for a normal person. You perfected this art, and decided to use it when you peeked in the door and spotted a goofy Aradia in her wild habit.

"Sooo..." You said coolly, making the poor girl nearly jump out of her skin, twisting the chair around sharply to stare at you. She was almost winded, maybe from shock.. Maybe from her spinning? You knew you wouldn't ask.

"Uh- Hi Dave! I didn't hear you come in!" She slightly stuttered, a light pink blush dusting her cheeks as she blinked innocently at you. You couldn't help but smirk at this.

"You wouldn't of, Huh?" You say, hearing your own southern drawl ring into your ears. Making you wince almost visibly. Almost. However, you keep your stoic stance, with a smirk plain to see.

"Uh.. W-Well I.. It's just.. Doesn't John get to go outside back today?" She fumbled for a bit before smiling innocent at you, regaining her ever so bubbly style. This makes you raise both eyebrows before removing your weight from the desk.

"Yeah.. Bye, Spinner!" You say, Walking away quickly before ducking your head down to count the tiles. Always Sixty-two. Why sixty-two? You'd remember that number til the day you died.

Once again, sprinting up the stairs, and a little less of a sprint to his room. you wasted no time letting him sleep today, You simply leaned over him and poker his cheek gently.

"Jooohhhnnnn.." You mumbled, eyeing all of his features. His face was round, a soft shape that was covered in the cutest spray of freckles. You could tell he had washed his hair last night due to it was EVERYWHERE. Granted, it normally was everywhere, but even more so right now. You gave way to a smirk as you noted this. Somebody goes to bed with a wet head, that's naughty, John. You'll get sick from that... Sicker...

You sigh before repeating the process as the last attempt only made him wrinkle his nose up quickly like a bunny. Damn, What if John was part bunny? Holy shit, You now see the appeal in play girls. Is it play girl or play boy if John was one? Well fuck.

You sighed, leaning back a bit before poking his cheek a little harder. "Egbert." You muttered, watching him quickly flip the cover over his face and turn away from you. Murmuring something you couldn't quite make out. You figured it was along the lines of 'no dad'.

"Joohhnnn. If you don't get up I'll lay with you." You muttered, glaring at the ball of a blanket that was John. You sat there staring for a second before shrugging your shoulders.

It took a little bit of John's grunting before you managed to rip some cover from him, crawl into the hospital bed and lay on your side. Your back pressed against his, _and his butt against yours_, but it definitely made him wake up a bit.

"Seriously Dave?.." He muttered, making you flip over to face his back with a smile as you found his blue pjs. They were silk, oh how fancy Mister Egbert! It took a few seconds before you licked your lips and focused on the back of his tussled black head.

"I thought we were going outside today." You shrugged, grabbing a bit of his hair and fumbling with it in between your hands. You can't lie, You'd rather curl up around this boy then play dully with his locks of hair. No matter how kick ass soft they were.

You laid there for a second, awaiting the black haired boy's reply eagerly. After a few minutes you sighed and sat up in the bed before laying sideways with half of your body laying on John's side. It was uncomfortable, his bony arms in your back, cutting your spine's life short, really. On the other hand, you knew it was probably uncomfortable for him too.

"Daveeee.. What time is it even?" He whined, making you grin childishly before swallowing your emotions as you dug in your jean's pockets for your phone. You blinked at the screen for a second- blinking at the Pinkie Pie background before sighing.

"It's 11:37 you lazy ass." You muttered, before turning your head to the left. Blinking a bit behind your shades as you met sleepy-blue eyes staring at you.

"Dave.." He yawned, frowning a little at you.

"Yes, Little angel boy?" You mocked, okay not really mocked. You fully meant it, But you knew very well he'd take it as a joke.

"I'm tired." He whined, jabbing his elbow into your side a little deeper. Yeah, okay ouch, Egbert. You faked a wail before flopping on your stomach, eyeing his face dully.

His blue eyes met your sunglasses, and you stared back. Knowing he couldn't see your eyes. You preferred this. Your cool facade. Yes. It was the normal thing for a Strider to prefer.

"I guess we'll just have to be napping buddies then, Share some blanket dude." You hissed, making him giggle sheepishly. God, He's cute, and it kills you.

"I'm not sleeping with a weird boy!" He laughed, making you feign a pained expression.

"Wow, You talk like I'm going to give you cooties, John." You sigh, before making a kissy face and having a hand shoved into your face.

"I'm up I'm up mom, Just get off of me!" He groaned, making you smirk even with his hand making your glasses go a little sideways across your face.

"I win." You say, hopping off of the raven haired boy as he sat up in the bed, yawning dully at you. "Whatever." He muttered, grabbing his glasses swiftly and hobbling into the bathroom.

You waited there for about 15 minutes playing some flappy bird, mocking Justian Bieber fans on Twitter, and doing everything in between before John come out of the Bathroom.

He was wearing a pair of normal jeans, a blue and white shirt, his glasses. His hair? Naturally messed up, but you could see where he tried and gave up on it.

"Ready, my Princess?" He rolled his eyes at the question and hopped out of the room before you, leaving you to follow after him.

It was the usual walk through the halls, Elevator, and to the main area where Aradia was behind he desk. Smiling brightly at you and John. Who seemed to be hiding a little behind you out of nervous habit.

"Have fun!" She called as you waved to her, walking around her desk and to one of the doors that lead to the outside. You held the door open, which John ran out of really fast making you laugh. Such a child.

You didn't really do much but pluck a piece of grass from the fenced area and twirl it in between your fingers. Watching the boy you loved run around like an idiot and occasionally stand there and just feel the wind.

"Dave!" He panted to you after awhile, flopping down beside you. Making you laugh and his sprawled out position.

"Yeah man?" You asked, flicking a piece of dirt off his close as you watched his blue eyes flutter open. And his mouth.. His mouth curve into a frown.

"I feel sick."

* * *

**oops**


	4. February 24th

**_Hiii, It's just me. The loser admin that updates once in 7 blue moons, you know? Yeah that one._**

**_Thank you all for reviewing and stuff on this, it means a lot to me, seriously! I'm astounded that people like this haha._**

**_And yo-_****_No the character Aradia in this story could have been anyone really. I just like Aradia. So don't worry. She's just here to be a doll. uwu_**

* * *

_===Be Dave Strider, Just Dave. Dave Strider. Agent 001, Too cool to copy._

_February 24th._

Hell yes.

Hell fucking yes.

How many times has that gone through your head today within 5 minutes?

You're not sure.

Not enough. So let's go once again.

Hell yes.

You approach Aradia at your usual pace, who seems a little bit more hawk eyed for your arrivals lately. However, her brownish orange orbs behind her glasses are locked on your binder in hand.

Her pen placed delicately on her lip stick plastered lips before she used it to point at it.

"Whats that?" She questioned a little bit curtly. Making your roll your eyes and groan slightly.

"The most ironic thing is history that has ever come to this god damned building besides me, myself, and I." You say, rolling your eyes behind your shades for the extra dramatic effect. Sure, she can't see your eyes. But you hoped she could feel it, somehow.

"That doesn't answer the question at all, Dave.." Aradia sighed, leaning back in her chair to glare at you dully. To which you smirk at and roll your shoulders.

"Ah, Sorry deary. Special eyes only." You inform her before stepping away from the desk to count your ever so familiar tiles before taking the stairs.

Sixty-Two tiles.

4 flights of stairs.

You hate stairs.

Whatever. It's good leg warm ups, right? You can hear Bro scoffing at you right now.

After basically sprinting up the stairs, and attempting not to be winded from it. You arrive in the same room. Same room as always.

However.

He's awake, Sitting up in his bed with his blankets stopping barely on his chest. Hospital gown in all it's glory.

Blue orbs are focused completely on you.

"Dave..?" He asks, voice still laced with the after effects of sleep, and it's enough to make you smirk. But you don't. But you do. In your head.

"Yo man, What're you doin' up?" You ask, shuffling into the room and attempting to hide the binder as you flop into the chair by his bed, however you know he's seen it. Not really anywhere to hide a bright ass blue binder.

"I.. That doesn't matter.. Why're you already here?" He mumbles with a yawn before glancing away and back to you.

"It's 9:32, what the hell Dave.." Ah, He was looking at a clock. What a cheater. This game isn't fun.

"I came earlier than normal. I woke up when Dirk got ready for work today." You lie. You lie straight through your teeth. You love coming here early and watching him sleep. Woah. Holy shit. Back that the fuck up. Reverse reverse. That's.. fuck.

He stares at you, okay squints since he is missing his glasses, for several seconds before sighing.

"Isn't Dirk a night DJ?"

Shit.

Abort mission.

Agent 001 has failed.

Holy fuck shit fuckity fuck duck your butt shit.

"You have to prepare you turntables and shit during the day, dude. You can't just go there and expect to be perfection. Hell no. You have to bake it, bake it and keep with it until the oven is just right. And then you throw it in and let that baby sizzle. Sizzle it nice."

"What?"

"I'm not really sure either."

He rolls his eyes and you and gives you grin at this. "So what's the binder, Dave?"

Ah, yeah. Shit.

"It's actually.. Really.. Nerdy."

And close to your heart.

Everything.

You love this binder.

Not as much as the boy in front of you.

But you love this binder.

"What is it?" He asks you again as you place it in your lap dully. Glaring at the binder intently.

You are a Strider.

"A photo album."

A nerdy Strider who makes photo albums.

"What? Really? I want to see." John tells you slowly, scooting slightly over in the hospital bed and patting the new found space beside him.

You gulp down your pride and walk over to the spot. Flop onto the bed, and hand him the glossy blue binder.

It took you hours to work up the nerves to do this. You hope it will be worth it. It takes him a second, before he opens it, and flips the first page of photos. He laughs, pointing at a picture of you and him, clearly a selfie taken by you while giving him the bunny ears. He's smiling his buck toothed smile in it.

A true smile. You miss it.

"I remember this picture! It was our 6th grade end of the year field trip! You took some guy's cotton candy and then rode-"

"The scambler and basically puked everywhere. Yeah let's not talk about that."

"Hahahhaha, But it was so ironic of you!"

"Shut the fuck up, Egdork."

He snorts a little, cute as fuck, before flipping more pages and slowly glancing at you.

"Dave?"

"Yeah man?"

"This is just pictures of you and me.. Where's rose and everyone else?" He asks, blinking at you innocently as you avoid eye contact.

"This is our binder. Just.. Good memories of us, you know?"

It's silent. He's staring at you. Silently. God, thank Bro for teaching you lessons in poker faces because wow. John is a toughie.

"Is it because I'm going to die soon?" He asks you meekly, a frown on his lips. And a iron weight on your heart. Strider over board. May day. Mayday. Ahoy. Avast ye sailors, You need a life jacket for this sea of tears in your soul.

"What? Fuck- No. Dude, no! That's.. fuck.." You groan at him, and lean your head back, frowning to the ceiling. That's not it.

"Then what?"

I love you Egbert.

Why can't you just say it?

I love you John.

Say it.

"It's complicated." You mumbled, crossing your arms and looking back to him, who seems focused on a picture of Halloween.

You were vampire that year, and he was a ghostbuster. Again.

"I don't have as much time as you, so please just tell me.." He says, a choked sob at the end of it.

You can't help it.

Your arms are around him in a choke hold as you clutch him for dear life.

"Because I love you."

"I love you too, dude."

"No John. Like, I'm gay for you." You mutter slowly, and he's quiet. You can't even hear him sob.

You can't hear him do anything for a long while. He's just... silent.. Not even moving.

"I'm not a homosexual, Dave.." He says, pulling away from your grip and staring at you. He looks.. horrified?

"I...I know but.. It's just.."

"I'm not a homosexual.. Dave." He repeats, almost in a angry tone as he .. glares.. at you? What.. is going on here?

"I know!" You tell him, of course you know. Of course you god damned know!

"Please just leave.." He tells you slowly, making you die. You. Are dead. there are no resurrections. This is it. You tried, and failed. Why? Why?

"John I.."

"Dave, Get out.." You don't realize it until you feel the tears hit your hands that you're bawling.

You can't even stop it.

You're crying without sniffling. You're numb.

"Okay.." You say slowly, getting up and walking away. Glancing at him dully. It hurts. To even look at him. He looks... so pissed off? Why? Why?

What did you do?

Why did you do it?

Why?

Why do you have to be such a fuck up?

Why?

"Keep the binder.." You tell him numbly, leaning on the door frame. Still crying like a fucking child. God damn it. And then you choke. You fucking choke.

You want to die.

Why? Why did you tell him?

You choke as he tosses it harshly to the ground, and stares at you.

"I don't want your memories."


End file.
